two wrongs make a right.

they say,
you meet the wrong people only to prep you to meet the right people.
two negative makes a positive?
well, i say i’m done with meeting the wrong ppl.
not only do i wanna be friends with them and not lose them in my life
but i’m anxious about my future,
i wanna know what’s next,
i’m getting tired of waiting for the next step,
i come home, wait to see if i get to where i wanna go
wait for an answer
nothing seems to be happening at the right time.
i can’t help but to feel left out, alone perhaps…
i’m anxious and still waiting.
wish me luck

and here i am, still sitting,

and i’m proud to say,
i’ve just realized that i’ve deleted his number from my phone,
after the incident,
i’ve always thought that one day he’ll talk to me again
and we’ll be the same best friend and sibling relationship as we were before
and i’ve waiting,
i guess not it’s gonna happen
and i did wonder why i still have his number there,
but i think it was cuz i was really hoping to keep this friend.
well, so one day as i was looking through my phone book,
his name was gone,
and i mean, i can easily restoring this number.
but i’m not.
sometimes, when you have something that you really want to let go
but you can’t bring yourself to,
get someone to do it, secretly
cuz then you won’t notice.
i’ve never felt better 🙂

i don’t need any of ur jesus light,
i produce my own now.
WHAT! >:)


risky business.

well well well,
was today quite a reflection in life ._______.
however, i have a slight feeling even with all this enlightment
i’m not gonna carry out with these plans,
HAHA fail :

first of all,
it’s quite ironic how
when i’m dealing with other people’s business i get so pick,
OCD? “mother like”? perfectionist?
and yet when i get home,
my room’s a mess,
my table really isn’t my table…
complete opposites.
maybe it’s cuz i’m a LIBRA!
ooohhhh crazy! it must be the BALANCE
no clue.
and so just this spring break,
i cleaned my desk. YAY! 😀
and i must say. it’s nice with it clean and all 🙂
and i start to wonder why i didn’t clean it EARLIER.
(or maybe…slack)
and now i’ll tell you that i’ll clean my desk more often,
once again, i know i won’t stick to it…. FAIL.

maybe when my parents tell me to do something
or when i tell myself
“i think i need to/ should _________”
maybe i should do it PRONTO.
i always answer “OKAY” or “yea…sure…later”
i forget…
on thursday, i said,
okay i’ll so some hw.
i didn’t start till saturday…
and i didn’t get much done.
you know what i’m talking about.
i hope this changes by the time i’m in uni >__>

and last (i think)
i gotta learn when to say no.
even if i really want to,
and it’s really risky.
even thought i didn’t get in trouble today,
but i KNEW i wouldn’t get there in time,
yet i still went.
not don’t was it dangerous for me,
NO, change that, not just me,
rushing me bak,
DUDE, and in front of us was a PURE EXAMPLE
of what could happen if we weren’t careful,
it’s scary.
so here the next change i guess,
if i know i can’t make it/ do it,
don’t make any commitments,
or even, if you can’t do it without shame, or scared to be caught then don’t do it…
today was too close.

a dream, a life, a hope,
it’s on the line,
it can burst so easily.
TOO easily.

blame it on the superstition

this has been the worst, term, month, week, day, hour, MINUTE even,
so far in my whole entire life.
yea you heard me,

i mean, my grades are fine (ish, i guess…)
and whatever,
but there has been tests failed, quizes failed, unproductive days,
items lost, things not done well,
disappointments, numerous actually
i unno,

and yet,
day after day, test after test,
and quiz after quiz i tell myself,
“you know what? i’ll do better next time, maybe tomorrow is gonna be a better day.”

but i find myself blaming random stuff,
like, oh this week is just a bad week,
or, i unno, stupid so-and-so!!!
when CLEARLY it was my fault.
arg i unno,
i’m frustrated DAILY about school,
and i ment to type this AGES ago,
but i guess i did LOL,
cuz i was LAZY and UNPRODUCTIVE.
this is sad 😦

lets move to a happier topic i guess,
i got an “A” in english!?
i have a pretty good average for uni? :S
i guess.
that’s it for the happy stuff LOL
fail eh? :

i need some PIILLSSS
druggy 8)
stole this off someone’s xanga…AHAHA

my hair is longer than that 😀